Assurance

I currently have the cheapest health insurance and car insurance that it is possible to have, meaning that if anything ever does happen, I'm going to have a pretty big deductible. That's okay with me. I'd rather save my money myself than rely on insurance to take care of me. Of course, when it comes right down to it, I'm not depending on my savings or my IRA either. Because there is one inherent flaw with that kind of insurance against disaster, namely that it relies on what I do.

The very word insurance implies that I must take some kind of step beforehand to ensure that I am taken care of if or when a disaster happens. And no matter how well I plan, there is no way I will ever be able to take every possibility into account. If I were capable of such a task, I have the feeling I would spend my time being so cautious and worried about what might happen that I would forget completely about living.

Wonderfully for me (and all of you), this isn't the way salvation works. God doesn't insure us against future disaster. Salvation isn't a contract of, "I give you this much, and you give me this much if such and such occurs under these given circumstances." If it were, I would, once again, be driven to madness by the worry of what might happen in the future. I mean, what if my premium isn't paid in full when I suddenly get hit by a bus? I know for sure the bill would bankrupt my eternity.

God doesn't deal in insurance. Instead, he has given assurance of salvation through the death and resurrection of his son, and in his sending of the Holy Spirit. Assurance, unlike insurance, does not require action on my part aside from acceptance. To assure someone, means to remove all doubt from their mind, to promise that what is hoped for will happen. A promise. From God. There isn't anything more solid than that. So I can rest in peace, knowing that even if and when the worst (illness, persecution or loss) does happen, I have the assurance of my God that he will take care of me, whether or not (more likely, not) I've met my deductible.

"Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that he opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full of assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of faith without wavering, for he who promised is faithful." Hebrews 10:19-23

Rails

Beliefs are the rails upon which our lives run.
We almost always act according to what we really believe.
It doesn't matter much what we say we believe or what we want others to think we believe...
That is why behavior is such a good indicator of a person's beliefs.
 - J.P. Moreland

   This made me stop and ask myself: what do I really believe? I know what I want to believe or what I say I believe, but if I look at my actions, what do they say I believe? The answer makes me want to flinch, because if I'm honest with myself, it's more than a little painful.

    If I truly believe a loving God is in complete control, not only of the universe but of my life individually, and if I completely trust him to take care of me and to work for the best in line with his perfect will, then I will be secure in where I am and what I am doing. I will not panic at unexpected circumstances, because I will know that while they were unexpected to me, God was not surprised, and his plan is still working as it should. I will not complain, because I would realize that the best growth comes through hard times and difficult situations, and, of course, that complaining never helped anything anyway. I will not cry out at the unfairness of life or lose myself in self-pity, because I won't be focusing on myself, I'll be looking to God. If I truly believe...

   But I do panic, I do complain, I do spend far too many nights crying because I'm alone, and life just isn't fair---and---and---

   So what do I believe? According to my actions, I believe that God cares about big things and great works, like countries and salvation, but not my every day, individual life. That somehow, in the midst of everything, I was forgotten, because I'm not important enough to merit the kind of attention that say, a missionary or civil rights leader, anyone with a more important calling than mine, would get. That because I'm not where I wanted to be, God must not care.

   And that's wrong. I know it's wrong. If God didn't care about normal, individual people, then none of my faith would make sense at all. It is my fault that my expectations were not where God wanted them to be. My fault and not God's that I was not prepared for my life to end up where it is. My fault that I don't look to him when I need help rather than looking down at the mire and bewailing my unlucky state. But how can I change beliefs that I didn't even know I had? I already know the truth. That isn't the issue. But how do I take what I know is true and make it what my heart (or my kidney, if you want to be Biblically accurate) believes?

   If beliefs are rails, then to change my beliefs, I'm going to have to do some heavy lifting. I'm going to need rails and ties, reason and time and a lot of prayer, and every time I start rolling down the tracks, I'm going to have to consciously move the switch, to say "I believe, help my unbelief!", to remind myself about what I know, until what I know is what I believe, and what I believe is what I do.

1. J.P. Moreland, "Living Smart," in Passionate Conviction: Contemporary Discourses on Christian Apologetics, ed. Paul Copan et al. (Nashville: B&H Publishing Group, 2007), 25.

Faith Is...

Faith is a word that is overused and, much like love, has lost its potency in the repetition. For many people, I believe it has become a vague, amorphous word used to describe anything from a general belief that things will turn out as they are fated to turn out to a belief in a random higher power to the conviction that the Christian God exists and works in our lives.

Those of us who are Christians are, I think, in danger of accepting this word, faith, in its watered-down version even when we read it in God's word. For instance, Hebrews 11, the famous Hall of Faith chapter begins, "Now faith is being sure of things hope for, the conviction of things not seen." This seems hopeful and happy and secure, but can you see it's power?

                Now faith is [being sure] of things hoped for...

[the assurance]

[the confidence]

[the substance]

[the basis]

[the substructure]

[the essence]

[the reality]

Hebrews 11:1

Faith is the most solid possible conviction that what we have placed our hope in is the truth and nothing less. 

Our faith is not simply a vague feeling or idea that what we believe is true. It is, in fact, the very evidence that unseen things do exist, that what we hope for is reality.

Faith is not something we come across on our own. It does not spring from rational arguments and scientific proofs. Although both can be useful in supporting faith they cannot cause it. We can have faith only because the Holy Spirit has graced us with the knowledge that God is real and merciful. And for this reason, our faith is not ungrounded, or irrational, a simple delusion that what we might wish to happen will be. Rather, by its very existence, our true faith is the proof that God is real and wishes us to know him.

It is not, by far, the only proof that God exists. But it is by far the most personal and convincing.

    "And without faith is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him."

Hebrews 11:6

This verse implies that two things must be present in true faith: the belief that God exists, not just any god, but our God as shown in the scripture, and the belief that he will reward us for seeking him. If either of these two beliefs is missing, then what we have no reason to hope for what we hope for (i.e. eternal life, salvation, mercy). If God does not exist, then he cannot save us. If he does not reward us for seeking him, then there is no point to trying because judgement will be meted out as he pleases without regard for our relationship with him.

There was another thing in this verse that struck me strongly, though I already knew it. Our drawing near pleases God. He isn't simply standing there, impersonally handing out trophies like a judge at a track meet. He is pleased to see us. Our desire for him brings him joy. He wants us to be close to him. And the way we get close to God is by that very faith with which he has blessed us!

Faith is not vague, it is not superstition, it is not irrational. Faith is the most valuable proof we have of God's love, and it should not be watered-down lest we forget just how powerful a tool we have by the grace of God. Soli Deo Gloria.

"And what more shall I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets---who through faith conquered kingdoms, enforced justice, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, were made strong out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight." - Hebrews 11:32-34

Hijacked

It has taken me a while to realize that the way I react to things happening in my life is not necessarily the way that I want to act. Given a calm environment, I know that my reason works competently enough that I could make a reasonable decision. However, add a little stress, a little hunger, a little sleep-loss and/or a whole blender-full of hormones and, suddenly, my reason becomes overwhelmed. Bad decisions aren't necessarily seen as good; they just aren't seen as decisions at all. In fact, I react as if I had no choice but to react as I do. And that is completely untrue. I don't have to react in any way, because I am a rational (mostly) human being who has the capability of making good decisions even if I am stressed or hungry or tired. So why don't I?

To put it simply, my brain has been hijacked...by my past decisions. The brain is very impressionable, and it assumes once you've done something several times that that is how you would always like to do it. It lays down the imprint, creates a map and starts traveling the same road until the ruts become trenches, then canyons. When this comes to things like riding a bike, tying your shoes or being able to drive to work without having to consciously think about what you're doing, this ability to maintain nueropathways is quite useful. When it comes to reacting badly to a slow driver, or stressing over work, or really any number of situations where I let my emotions take over...it's not so good.

The good news is that my mind (being a separate entity that controls the actual physical brain in a way that still mystifies scientists) is capable of retraining my brain so that the decisions that I make impulsively are good rather than...not so good. In order to do this, however, I have to be able to stop, realize that my brain is getting ready to plummet down that canyon road, and pull it over to another path before that happens. Sometimes, this feels very much like wrestling the wheel away from hijackers (emotional hijackers, who have some really good arguments and some really poor impulse control), and I think how much easier it would be just to let things run toward gravity. Easier, yes. Better, no.

I don't think it's a coincidence that Galatians ends the list of the fruit of the spirit with self-control. After all, if I am constantly working at being loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, gentle and faithful, then I will have self-control. I will forge new paths to become roads that will turn into highways themselves. And I will be much more difficult to hijack.

Shine

"Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain."

Philippians 2:14-16

European Space Agency & NASA

 

This has never really been my favorite verse. As a child, it was liberally quoted to me by my parents, usually when I was complaining, which did not in all honesty make me any more likely to appreciate the truth of it. It's akin to the "children, obey your parents" verse that was also frequently referenced in my childhood. However, looking past all that, I've been thinking about this verse more and more recently.

I notice that Paul didn't write, "Do everything at home without grumbling," or "do not have disputes with your fellow Christians." He was, in fact, a little more broad in his instructions. And no matter how I look at it "all things" comes down to mean, basically, everything. Everything. So if I get stuck with an unfair assignment at work, or I have to stay late, or I'm in the long line at the grocery store and the lady in front of me can't figure out how to use her credit card, or I have to wait three hours for an oil change...those are all situations included in everything. In short, Paul is telling them to have a lifestyle where complaining simply does not exist...at all. The end result being that we shine.

Why? Because complaining is easy. Far easier for me than keeping my mouth shut and smiling.

So I tried it. I mean, I consciously decided I wasn't going to complain about anything at work. And, guess what? Life was so much easier. It wasn't that the situation was any better. I certainly could have used more help than I got, but somehow, it didn't matter as much as it usually does. I found that having made the decision, I turned to God more throughout the day, rather than just letting things ride.

It's amazing to me how I can have the attention, love and help of the God of the universe, who is beyond time and space, and I forget to ask him to work in me. Not just once or twice. I consistently forget that he is behind every good thing that I want to do, every worthwhile effort that I make. I don't think it's pride that makes me think I can get through on my own, because I know when I think about it, that I can't do it by myself. I do think it's habit. I have spent so much time focusing on myself, that I automatically look to myself for strength. And it just isn't there.

The best way to stop a bad habit is to replace it with a new one. So here it is. "Rejoice in the Lord always: again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:4-7




 

Why I Don't Believe in Santa Claus

I don't like Santa. I love Christmas. My dislike for Santa Claus has nothing to do with how I feel about the holiday. But I'm frustrated by what I see in every store, in almost every facebook post, and shining bright in Christmas lights. The magic of Christmas is not a jolly man in a red suit coming to reward good behavior and punish bad. It isn't even the more realistic story of a good man who wanted, either in reality or simply in legend, to help three poor girls out with their dowry. I very much doubt that St. Nicholas, if he were really as righteous and pious as the stories suggest, would have even wanted so a--well, let's face it---ludicrous character named after him, and I am certain he would not have wanted said character to take over the holiday meant to celebrate the birth of Christ.

Because the true "magic" of Christmas is simply this: that God became human to save a people who wasn't even that interested in him.

Wait...

Let that sink in.


I know you probably know it already, but really stop and think about it. The God of the universe, the one who created galaxies and knows the stars by name and is eternal, timeless, ageless, became human. He stepped, intentionally and with perfect design, into a single, fragile body on a single broken world, to be helpless, and hungry, to know pain and loneliness and suffering.

This broken world had no hope. None at all. The world was dark, and there was no light in it. Until God came to walk with us. Imagine being in the dark and the cold. Imagine never knowing light. Then imagine the amazement of seeing for the first time, of light coming through the dark and showing you colors, textures, brilliance and radiance. Hope. Love. Peace.

That fact, in itself, is so amazing that I can hardly hold it in my head long enough to really think about it.

This is the Christmas story. It is the very essence and meaning of Christmas. And anything else, no matter how cheerful, or harmless, or well-meant, looks cheap and tarnished in comparison.

But do the people across the street have a manger scene in their yard? No. They have a blow-up Santa. Why? Santa Claus can't save them. St. Nicholas couldn't have even if he'd tried. And the Santa today very little resembles the saint for whom he was named in any case.

My problem with Santa Claus is that he isn't my savior, he's not real, and he has no right to be at the center of attention. My problem with Santa Claus is that people use him as an excuse to lie to their children because it's "traditional" and "magical" and because they don't want their kids to miss out. But I have to ask, what would they be missing out on? Christ's salvation still stands, so what do they have to lose? Except, maybe their faith in you, when they realize you've lied to them.

So, no, I don't believe in Santa Claus, nor do I think we should encourage children in any tradition that, at its core, has deception as a necessity. Stockings are fine. I think they're a cute way to do little gifts. But don't lie about who fills them.

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God...in him was life, and that life was the light of men. The lights shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

John 1

Impossible Grace

What grace is this that saves me, unworthy, from the storm?
What love is this that finds me, lost and rebellious, in the deepest darkness?
What hope that shows me a future beyond all imagining and desperate longing?
Who is this that offers such refreshment to my soul, such rest to my weary spirit?

It is my Lord, and him alone. Nothing else will suffice once truth has been tasted, for all the world goes to ashes around me when I look to him. Everything is shaken, but that one, who holds me and covers me with the corner of his great cloak. To him I must cling or be lost, I think. And failing again, I feel that his arms are holding me, safe though I try to wander, though my eyes are caught by pretty things, my heart by things not so pretty, my mind by ideas that run rampant instead of held captive to truth.

This is grace, impossible
This is love, unstoppable
This is hope, undying
My Lord, my God, my Love is faithful beyond eternity

"Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you..." "For you have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling..." "Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is your. Yours is the kingdom, O Lord, and you are exalted as head above all." "He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." "But we are not those who shrink back and are destroyed, but those who have faith and preserve their souls." "...for our God is a consuming fire." "...who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time." "And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who desires take the water of life without price."