To the Young Women in My Life

To the young women in my life...

1. What do you want to be remembered for? I don't mean after your death, but five or ten or fifteen years from now, when you've moved on to a new city and you're out on your own, when you've found new friends to add to the old ones, how do you want them to think about you?

2. How do you see yourself? I don't mean physically, but how do you see your own attitude. Would you want to be friends with someone exactly like yourself? If there's something you don't like, you have the power to change it. Happiness is a choice.

3. Take a deep breath. Never, ever panic.

4. What do you fight for? What do you fight about? There are some things, most things in fact, that aren't worth the trouble. Family, marriage and friends are not among them. Never fight for yourself; fight for those you love.

5. Be strong enough to do it yourself, but if someone offers, let them help you.

6. Offer to help others.

7. Fall in love with God before you even think about "liking" someone else. I don't care how cute he is...if he's not in love with God, you'll regret it. By the way, cute only lasts six months, at most.

8. Boys are not stupid. They are different. Very, very different. Talk to them like you would talk to someone who has just learned English as a second language. Be careful. Be kind. Be clear. Don't expect mind-reading.

9. Forgive. Even if they never admit they are wrong, forgive them. Don't assume they meant to hurt you. If you have a problem, talk to them personally, not about them to others. Never gossip.

10. You don't have to have a career. You don't have to get married. You don't have to have children. But you do have to be useful, helpful, compassionate. Make a difference wherever you are.

11. Learn to cook. It'll save you so much money. And baking is fun.

12. Pray. All the time.

13. Dress well. Let's be honest, you know when you're wearing something too short, low-cut or tight. Don't. You're beautiful, and you don't need to degrade yourself to get attention.

14. I love you all, and I always will.

Quasar

When I was in high school, a band called the Smalltown Poets sang a song with these lyrics: There must be something else that all of this revolves around / I appear so small and barely make a sound / Still mysterious these frequencies they draw you out / Looking for some light, see what I'm all about / The rest of them are stars / I'm a quasar.

This caught my attention, as it may have yours, because quasar isn't a word you hear in everyday conversation. To be as brief as possible, quasars are QUASi-stellAR radio sources. They surround black holes at the center of certain galaxies and emit massive amounts of light along with radio waves. They are the some of the most luminous objects in the known universe.

Quasar 3C 273

Now, back to the song.

Obviously, as Christians, our light should be drawing people to study us and ask what makes us shine so brightly. We should be quasars.

But that's easier said than done. Philippians 2:14-15 gives us some good guidelines for shining. "Do everything without grumbling and arguing, so that you may be blameless and pure, children of God who are faultless in a crooked and perverted generation, among whom you shine like stars in the world." 

 This is a verse I was often (read very, very often) reminded of as a teenager. As sometimes happens, this repetition has led me to sort of ignore this verse for the most part. I definitely haven't given it as much thought as I should have in recent years. But now that I am thinking about it, wouldn't it be spectacular to be around someone who never complained or grumbled about anything? I'm not talking about false smiles and such, but what about someone who actually had that sort of attitude? Wouldn't that be awesome? Wouldn't that make you wonder what that person had going on that made them so capable of serenity? It would make me wonder. And I'm supposed to be a quasar.

Another thing of note about quasars is that they don't draw energy from within themselves. Unlike like stars, they aren't burning fuel that is packed inside them. Instead, as far as people can tell at this time, quasars emit light and radio waves as a result of gases swirling around and being inexorably drawn into the black hole. Gravity and massive amounts friction come into play as well as event horizons and other astronomical physics things. If you understand all the maths involved, I applaud you. As far as this illustration goes, however, it's only important to understand that something else powers the quasars. They aren't just out there burning brilliantly by themselves. In fact, if the black hole gives out, the quasar dissipates. So if we want to burn bright like quasars, we have to be close, event horizon close to the source of our power. The closer we get, the more light we will shine. And, like stars drawn to black holes and astronomers drawn to quasars, soon we will start pulling other people closer to our God.